The Toronto Raptors have a chance to make some noise in this year’s NBA Playoffs. That’s great news not only for the City of Toronto, which has gone six years without a rooting interest in an NBA playoff game, but also for the Internet at large. More Toronto means more of two of our favorite things:
- Rob Ford
- The Raptor
The Raptor, if you are not familiar, is the best mascot that has ever lived and breathed. Exhibit A: The video below of him rollerblading down stairs.
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Just to be clear, the Raptor voluntarily did something no one over the age of 8, or under the blood alcohol level of .2, has ever attempted: strap on a pair of skates and launch himself down a GIANT FLIGHT OF STAIRS. Even more amazing is that, according to this article, he had a 50-pound blower strapped to him at the time.
Of course, the stunt paid off with the greatest GIF of all time.
If this incident were the only time the Raptor had pushed through injury to make a fool of himself in front of thousands of strangers, it would have made him a legend in our book. It wasn’t. There’s wayyyyyy more.
Consider this video of the Raptor twisting his ankle during a dunk attempt.
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A sprained ankle would have sidelined the Phoenix Gorilla or Benny the Bull for a month. Not the Raptor. He came back in the second half for another dunk attempt. He failed again.
Last October, the Raptor tore his Achilles tendon performing backflips for elementary school students. Like a champ, he finished the event before going to the hospital for season-ending surgery.
But you can’t count out the Raptor for long. This week, Toronto had its bloody sock moment when the Raptor came back early. The team gave him a hero’s welcome. Fans cheered. We wept a little.
Raptor, you’ve won us over. Now go out there and devour a cheerleader.
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